This figurine is in a case outside the 3rd floor lounge. The plaque says "Class of 1977". I don't have much to say about it, other than I think it's pretty, and I hope to be graceful in this job someday. Right now I feel like a bumbling idiot.

I drove out to Hampshire to have dinner with my parents. My dad is having one of his knees replaced Tuesday, so I wanted to get out there and see him before the butchers got him. He keeps telling me he's going to save his knee in a jar, but I think it's just a threat.

They brought me out to show me the filly that had been born on Saturday. My dad said he went out to the barn in the morning, and there it was standing in the stall. I have very fond memories of my family going to Chick N' Dip for dinner and brainstorming names for the babies. I wonder what this one will be called.

Auction day for the Jeremy Hernandez Memorial League at Bill's place. The digital draft board and wireless internet have revolutionized the auction, which is my favorite part of any fantasy season. Overall, a good draft, with 5 managers present, 3 remote access, and 2 proxies. James was even able to Skype in from Edinburgh.

I won the JHML championship three years ago, but mismanagement and poor draft strategies have grounded Ator's Fighting Eagles the past couple seasons. Hopefully Jake Peavy, Jimmy Rollins, and Derrek Lee can help me soar above the competition. I was also pleased to welcome Moises Alou back to the eyrie, hernia and all.

I have a couple big assignments due in a couple weeks, but I decided that playing "The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker" was more important for my happiness.

And in the long run what's more important, writing an Evidence Based Practice literature review or saving a kingdom?

This food looks unappetizing in the picture, but I assure you, it was awesome.

Julie and I discovered that going to Kuma's Corner was something that was on both of our "Things To Do" list, so we went there for lunch. They are known for their burgers (we had the YOB: gouda, bacon, and roasted red pepper), macaroni and cheese (we elected to add broccoli and prosciutto), and metal sensibilities (I remember at least one Pantera song, and what sounded like Rainbow).

We proclaimed it as our last meal before we start dieting, but we'll see.

Last time I was in Holland in January, Julie and I went to the New Holland Brewing Company. I bought a growler of beer for the weekend, and then filled it up again on the way home. Before the trip, I had no idea what a growler was, and I thought it a delightful way to transport delicious beer.

I brought my growler with me again this week, and we stopped on the way home for some oatmeal stout. So now it's a tradition.

Chicago is somewhere just past those clouds.

I think we have been spoiled the last few years with mild winters of minimal snowfall. This year was a rude awakening. I know I've been down, and most people I talk to are totally defeated as well. It just won't end.

But the snow and cold were okay in Michigan. Here, they still make everything pretty, although I'm sure the Michiganders are as sick of it as we are.

Chocolate chip cookies, White Russians, and gin rummy - these are a few of my favorite things.
I really don't want to go home tomorrow.

I woke up and took a picture of Julie's family after they had returned from the Easter church service, feeling like a scumbag for sleeping in. "You can stay here and sleep" was just too tempting an offer from Julie. In my morning delirium, of course I'm going to take her up on that. I'm not Catholic, but I experienced some serious Catholic guilt the rest of the day.

I was finally able to shed some school-based anxiety and get started on the real relaxing. I laid around and read, ate delicious food, and got to know Julie's family. Good people.

SPRING BREAK!!!

Twelve years ago, I spent Spring Break learning how to do beer bongs in Daytona with some high school buddies. This year, I'm spending a relaxing weekend in Holland, Michigan with Julie and her family.

I had met her mother and two of her siblings in Chicago, so I at least had some familiarity to fall back on. I was intimidated going into the weekend, but the fact that they welcomed Julie's Taurus with a relentless, guerrilla style snowball attack meant that everything was going to be okay.

They taught me how to play "Oh, Hell!". I wanted to impress everyone with my aptitude for card games, but second-to-last place wasn't very impressive.

I met Arnie, Young, and Hansen at Resi's Bierstube for some heavy German beer and light conversation. Even though we did not have the full 2/3 vote needed to pass any motions, it was a good meeting.

We then went to Young and Arnie's to play Rock Band. It was my first time, and as you can see, I was the only one having fun. Also, playing drums is hard.

The bathroom next to the skills lab is marked as Unisex, but the conspicuous absence of urinals identifies it as a former Womens restroom. The first couple times I had to use it were difficult because I couldn't get over the feeling that even though the sign said it was okay, I really wasn't supposed to be there. Then a few weeks ago I went in and there were women having a conversation in adjacent stalls. Understanding that bathroom conversations with the same sex are confidential, I got the hell out of there.

I have since found a secret Men's room at the end of the hall, and my life is better for it.

After our time on the floor, we gather in a small lounge to discuss our patients and experiences, and to eat lunch. After the patient Jaime and I had this week, I was grateful for the time to reflect and debrief and process what we had experienced.

We cared for a woman with advanced metastatic ovarian cancer. Needless to say, she was very sick - her kidneys were failing, she was on a ventilator for respiratory failure, small bowel obstruction, contact isolation because of pneumonia caused by MRSA, stage IV pressure ulcer on her sacrum, and in a lot of pain. It's hard not to feel helpless. You want to work miracles for people and make them better, but in the end, you can only give them the best care that you are able to give, and that's what we tried to do.

I could write pages and pages on the experience. It tore me up. To me the worst part about it was the isolation. In what might be her last days, at the worst point in her awful disease, everyone has to wear a gown and gloves when they're around her, even her family. And worse than that, she cannot speak because of the tracheostomy. She has a dry erase board, but it was very difficult for her to write, and very difficult for others to read. Before we were done for the day, she asked for her board, and wrote something like "There is grass outside. Wheelchair. We have wheelchair." She just wanted to go home.

I don't want this blog to turn into a maudlin display of empathy, but a sincere reflection on what I'm experiencing and learning right now. So that's what I experienced this week. And I learned that this is going to be even harder than I thought.

After clinical today, I went over to the College of Nursing to print out some lecture notes. On the way from the hospital to the CON, we passed through a courtyard area where the old Nurses Home stands. I couldn't find any history on the building, but I guess it's where all the nurses used to live back when there was a more convent-like approach to nurses' housing. I think it houses offices and computer labs now, though I'm not sure. There may still be some old nurse living in the tower, and probably at least one ghost nurse who roams the halls and checks the vitals of administrative workers, but without them knowing it.

Justin and I went to Poitin Stil, our local, for a few St. Pats drinks. $3 Guinness pints and $3 Jameson shots spell danger for someone who has to get up at 4:45 am, but I was moderate in my consumption. I went home at 7 to look up my patient information to prepare for my second day at the hospital.

I am usually not a big fan of holidays that lend themselves to overconsumption, but I can stomach St. Patrick's Day just as long as I'm out on the actual 17th, and I'm in a place with a low choad count. If it happens to fall on a Friday or Saturday, great, but if it's on a Monday, I'm going to drink like it's a Monday, which most of the time means not at all.

Trupe and Sarah had their baby on Friday. Vivian Lux is her name. I went and saw her today, and she is pretty awesome. This picture is not Vivian Lux, but a horrifying representation of a baby. Trupe and Sarah, forgive me.

When I applied for the nursing program, I had to choose a specialty. I chose Acute Care, and I'm still figuring out what that means. I think that there is a little bit of freedom to move once we complete the RN portion of the program, before we start our Masters classes, depending on space in the various specialties. I am going to keep an open mind during all the rotations, and there's a tiny part of me that thinks it might be all right to be a Nurse Midwife. Just a tiny part, though.

Every week we have to complete a Clinical Data Sheet for our patient. It includes all the patient information, such as diagnosis, vital signs, pathophysiology of their condition, abnormal lab values, and all of the medications they are currently taking.

Me: Kevin, how long did it take you to do your Clinical Data Sheet?

Kevin: Seven hours. It's horrible.

Me: Really, it doesn't seem like it's going to be that bad.

After eight hours of working on this assignment, I had had enough, and decided to go play Monopoly with Justin and Dylan.

Dylan's balls out reckless approach to investment and property management won him the game. He housed and hoteled Justin and I throughout. Going to jail was a blessing; it meant you got to chill for three turns without having to pay anything.

We finished early, and somehow playing Asshole sounded like a good idea despite the massive PBR hangover that was sure to plague my Sunday. Dylan introduced his UP rules, we taught him how the flatlanders play, and a cross-cultural learning experience was shared by all.

Kristie and Jackie are my most frequent trainfriends. Today we got Katy as a bonus.

It's nice to have people to talk to during the commute, but I often fear that we are the train people I hate - talking a little too loud, laughing too often, and placing high importance on conversations of utter inanity.

Who knows, maybe we're the people other people wish they were. Or most likely, nobody gives a shit either way.

I played hooky from school today. I woke up feeling gross, and decided to stay home and rest and get some work done. I was actually looking forward to lecture today as my clinical instructor was teaching us neuro pathophysiology.

By far the most exciting part of my day was the trip to the post office to mail some books. Notice the long line and complete absence of employees behind the counter. There was a two minute span when not a single employee was up front. What the hell do they do in the back room? Maybe there are always cookies back there.

I subscribe to an online book swapping service, http://www.paperbackswap.com/. You post books that you are willing to part with, and when other members request them, you send them in the mail. For each book you send, you get a credit toward receiving a book from another user. Basically, you just end up paying postage. I have been reading like a maniac lately, and have come to look forward to my daily train rides as a time to crank through a couple chapters.

First day in scrubs. I think I'll always look like a dork in this uniform. Hopefully I won't always feel like a dork.

We are in the hospital on Tuesdays and Wednesdays for the rest of the semester. We are working with a partner for the first couple weeks, then by ourselves with a single patient.

I will obviously not be able to take many pictures in the hospital because of patient confidentiality rights. And I'm not even sure what I can talk about in the blog. I know it's not like I'm a subcontractor for the DOD building a top secret submarine, but I'm really tentative about posting details about patients, even while maintaining their anonymity. I need to figure out what I can and cannot write, or even what I feel comfortable writing.

For today, I'm just going to list tasks that I performed:
-took vital signs
-cleaned up sputum from a trach tube
-moved patient to cardiac chair
-performed a physical assessment
-monitored patient's oxygen levels and adjusted oxygen flow
-assisted RN with urinary catheterization and urine samples

Our patient was not getting enough oxygen, and was running a fever, so some normal care responsibilities such as bathing and oral care were lower priorities.
Time flew by, and in the end, I didn't feel like I did that much, and that I was kind of useless. But I learned a ton, and now get to look forward to the less intimidating second day.

Pardon the obviously posed, heavy-handed metaphor.
Our clinical group went to the hospital today to take a brief tour of the floor. There were real people in the beds. It was weird.

Tomorrow we take care of our first patients. I doubt I will sleep at all tonight.

I treated myself to breakfast at Golden Nugget today after buying nurse shoes at Sears. The shoes, which had to be white leather, are ugly. The breakfast, which had to be chicken fried steak and eggs, was wonderful.

The Drink Study Program increased its number today, and successfully made it through all three Pain/Pain Management powerpoints. We have yet to discover how many people it takes for Drink Study to degenerate into just Drink.

I love spending time at my parents' house. LOVE IT. They built a new farm after I moved to the city, so I have never lived there. It makes it sort of a vacation house. I'm not sure if it's the silence or the fresh air, or moderate carbon monoxide levels, but I sleep better there than anywhere else. I was only planning on staying one night, but I ended up sticking around for two. I watched a lot of movies, my mom cooked awesome food, and I got to spend time with my sister and parents, which I need to do more often.

After a few experimental dishes, my mom figured out how to replicate some Applebee's chicken item involving tortilla chips, cheese, and lime. It was delicious, and better than anything you can get at Applebee's. I was also fascinated to learn that my parents have gotten into watching bull riding on weekends, and have become quite knowledgeable on the subject. Did you know that the bulls are like athletes, and get points for throwing the riders, and these point standings determine the top bulls and their earnings? I didn't.

It's also nice seeing Bug (dog) and Morgan (cat). They are friends. Bug is not evil, despite the glowing eyes. Morgan, on the other hand, is foul-tempered and cruel. I have no doubt that she would kill all of us if she could. My mom had to put brown paper on the lower windows because the barn cats come onto the porch and taunt Morgan's imprisonment, which causes her to shriek in her true demon voice.

After school today, I drove out to the Heartland to have dinner with my family, and sleep at my parents' house (pictured). We went to Sorrento's, a family restaurant outside of Sycamore. It's on Route 64 (people out here don't call it North Avenue), right across the street from Sycamore Speedway, the place where I first learned the beauty of Demolition Derbies and Dollar Drafts. I taught my family the Check Take game, where you open the bill after dinner and react to it. My mom had an amazing, totally disgusted checktake, and my Aunt Darla reacted so violently she startled the nice family dining behind us.

Afterward me and my sister and her friend Stephanie went to a bar called MVPs. We met up with my cousin and some of his friends. It's the Sycamore equivalent of John Barleycorn or Hi-Tops, bars that I refuse to patronize when I'm in the city, but for some reason are fun places to be when I'm back home. I always enjoy being Country Mouse again, if for just a day or two.

Both an improv show and pool league are more fun than doing a physical assessment write-up, but I did the right thing tonight by staying home and working.

My workspace gets more unruly by the day. Not that Justin and I do much dining on the dining room table, but I should probably do something about it before an impromptu Euchre night calls for a straight-armed table sweep.

The physical assessment evaluation went well today. It was even kind of fun. Corey was a model patient, and I'm pleased to report that I found him to be in good health.

Afterward, I went to the Belmont Barber Shop for a desperately needed haircut. It was my first time there, and I'm pretty sure I'll go back. $15 haircut, pool table, and PBR? Yes, please!
I feel like kind of a scumbag for cheating on Betto, my old hair person, but it's just not convenient to truck over to Devon and Pulaski for a haircut. Maybe I'll alternate between the two, I don't know. Betto, forgive me!

Today we had a four hour training session for the charting software we're using in the hospital. I now have an appreciation for the incredible amount of documentation involved in nursing. It was quite overwhelming.

The only fun part of the training was the patient names. I was assigned Sue Chure; I had to hide my disappointment at not getting Angie O'Plasty.

The Waiting Room

All of the manikins were displaced from their homes today because we needed their beds to practice our physical assessments.

I delight in the random positions of manikins around the lab. Usually they just get thrown out of their beds onto the floor, or into other beds with strange dummies. I do not know who carefully arranged these fellows, but I approve.

Markski shows off his Polish eagle tattoo during the 2nd Annual Northtown Pulaski Day Professional Development Bar Crawl.

This event completed the trifecta of bar events this weekend. It's always fun hanging with the teachers, as long as you can avoid the Sharpies.

I accomplished nothing this weekend, with minimal guilt attached. I'm getting used to being a student again.

Today some nurses and friends got together for some afternoon beers at Duffy's.

Every time I happen to venture into Lincoln Park, I am reminded of why I rarely go to Lincoln Park. Example: Drunken meatheads jumping in front of cars that their friends are driving, flying off the cars, then pretending they didn't get hurt as their girlfriends cackle at their antics. But Duffy's during the day wasn't that bad a place, and they have deep fried macaroni bites, which are what Gods eat. They also have waffle fries, which are #1 on my frierarchy, mostly due to the high surface area. Here is the complete frierarchy:

1. Waffle

2. Curly

3. Tater tot

4. Crinkle cut

5. Hand cut (Murphy's in Champaign, Moody's)

6. McDonald's

7. Shoestring

8. Steak