Monday, April 14, 2008

A couple days before school started, I went grocery shopping with the idea that I would make all of my meals, thereby eating better and saving money. This plan worked well until I ran out of food and rekindled my reluctant love affair with Subway.

I finally went shopping again today. I was suckered into buying these novelty apples that are supposed to taste like grapes. There was no price listed, so I figured they would be $4 tops, a fair price to pay to satisfy my curiosity. When I got home, I discovered that I had paid $7 for them. I tried one, and yeah, it kind of tasted like a grape; but what I thought was a miracle of artificial selection and orchard ingenuity turned out to be a sham. They are just apples dipped in grape flavoring, and I paid the opportunity cost of a Saturday matinee to have them.

It made me wonder what other things could be dipped in flavoring and marketed with a clever smerge. I'm thinking about dusting these bananas in ranch flavoring and calling them baranchulas.

6 comments:

Ginger said...

Wow...thanks for enlightening me about Grapples. When I bought some, I too thought they were a marvel of agricultural engineering, until I got them home and realized they taste exactly like regular apples, but less crunchy. But, until now, I had no idea how little engineering was involved.

Incidentally, check out this quote from the company's homepage: "With childhood obesity increasing at alarming rates, Grāpple® brand apples could go a long way to improving the eating habits of children and introducing them to more produce." As though somewhat tasting like a grape (if you really try hard to imagine that it does) will make kids eat more apples - which I remind you are ALREADY sweet.

It makes me want to drive to Washington, find the CEO of this company, and slap his self-righteous, smug face.

Unknown said...

What is this, Tamalehawk or Bedpans and Broomsticks?

Meador said...

My apologies to Tamalehawk, but food is just so easy to photograph and write about.

Tamalehawk said...

If food is so easy, Tamalehawk should probably hang up his apron and call it a day, then, huh? Sorry he's not becoming a nurse!

He begrudgingly bestows a BaeRating of A- for baranchulas.

Meador said...

I meant easy in the sense that when I don't have anything else to post, and I have a food anecdote to tell, it becomes a standby. I know I couldn't do it every day, and definitely not with the poetic grace that emanates from Tamalehawk's wingtips.

Hank said...

Fine. Since no one else is making the joke, I'll step up to the plate.

Grapples? More like CRAPPLES. Am I right!?

Also, Meador, stop bird-blowing the 'Hawk.