Humbled

I did not pass my skills test today. I was devastated. Walking to my car, I realized that I was so upset because I have never failed a test before. Not ever. Sure, I've struck out with men on base, and I've given up on a Thursday NY Times crossword. But this was my first time failing a formal evaluation. It was a bit of a blow to my confidence, and made me question whether I should even be in this program. Kristie bought me Chipotle for driving her sprained ankle to school. I felt better after crawling into a burrito.

I wasn't worried going in, and I did well measuring urine output, changing the IV solution and tubing, and giving the subcutaneous heparin injection. But I made some stupid general mistakes that did me in, namely not closing the curtain for privacy, and not checking the patient's wristband to identify her as the right person. My evaluator was patient and fair, but I got so flustered knowing I had already made mistakes, that I kind of fell apart. I get to retest next week, and at least I know I won't make the same mistakes again. Kristie said that's called "failing forward". And I wasn't the only one to fail, which selfishly made me feel a little better.

Nick: (via email) Meador, I like to think that at the least your patient would scream, "Close the curtain, for God's sake! My balls are hanging loose! By the way, I'm not Herman Casalino." So two of those are usually pretty avoidable in a practical situation.